Thursday, February 15, 2018

Fitfully

Fitfully, I loved.
Electric in my skin.
Above, the sky turned starless,
bloodless,
a tent

revival;
a preacher
spitting sulfur to the wind.
There, fitfully, I loved you,
and I would again.

For Love Hurts at Real Toads

16 comments:

murias swan said...

Geez, this gave me chills. One of my favorites of yours, ever. Crazy good line break between tent and revival.

"a preacher
spitting sulfur to the wind"

Wow. I could say this to my husband.

Fireblossom said...

I agree about the line break.

You are very good at starting with something straightforward, shifting to some poetic shit, and then going back to straightforward, made all the stronger for the shift preceding.

Anonymous said...

there is fire and brimstone in this passion - so well penned

Jim said...

The preacher, sulfur. Fire and brimstone? Scared the bejesus out of your writer? For sure it did some good.
..

Sherry Marr said...

Wowzers! Yes, with that kind of love, one would again.

Toni Spencer said...

Short and to the point. The line break is truly flawless. Fire and brimstone. Yes, I would love again in that tent.

Rommy said...

Damn, this piece suggests so many things, letting the reader feel the protagonist's lust and shame. It's all right there, sighing between the lines. Masterfully done.

Margaret said...

I KNEW you would hit a homer with this one!

grapeling said...

ah. your pens always scan with purpose - that closing couplet - so good ~

Kim Russell said...

I love the defiance and the sounds in: 'Electric in my skin', 'spitting sulfur' and 'fitfully'.

Helen said...

Poem is stunning ... so few words!

brudberg said...

Passion is built from contrasts... pleasure and pain, fire and ice... and we always return to it again.

Sara McNulty said...

'a preacher
spitting sulfur to the wind'

What an amazing image that is! Wonderful poem.

Gillena Cox said...

Luv luv luv the image of LINE 2

much love...

Kerry O'Connor said...

I would again too.. but then I never learn.

Brendan MacOdrum said...

Faithfully, I'd say, to the conditions love has laid down from its sky. We get filled with the spirit, but we leak ...