Thursday, June 18, 2015

Pictures Of

A borrowed dress,
a church,
a man -
something blue.

Packed myself in a penny dreadful -
called it something new.

No one flies as the crow flies now -
or so I'm told.

A borrowed dress,
a church,
a man -
something old.

For Shay's "Pictures Of" prompt at Real Toads

23 comments:

Fireblossom said...

An eternity of a lifetime in 40 words. What strikes me the most is how you can make even this dry lament sound like a song.

Sanaa Rizvi said...

I agree.. this reads like a song.. one which will live forever :)

Sylvia K said...

Ah, yes and I do agree with Fireblossom and Sanaa and as always, no one says/writes it better than you!!

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I know the suitcase for such a journey gets very heavy at times.......I love "packed myself in a penny dreadful, called it something new." As we all do. Every. Single. Time. Thanks for nailing it, Mama Zen, as you always inimitably do.

Sage said...

The opening, for me, turns itself into "Picture Soft: a burrowed dress."

I love that you start with a wedding and end with a funeral. It's all the same, really.

Gail said...

You are just amazing!

X said...

Why make it traditional
when it won't last? Or maybe it's just to buck
tradition as well. Let's call it progress.

brudberg said...

The blues of something old.. love how you turned it all upside down. Maybe it works just as well as those cinderella lies.

Outlawyer said...

So so clever and also so sad. Straight arrow is what you are. Really well done, MZ. Great rhythms, rhymes, feeling, reverberations. Just super. Thanks. k.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

Such poignancy - such longing - such extravagant friggin' talent. I'd hate you if I didn't love you. - Mosk

Kim Nelson said...

The new becomes the old. We wonder about its value. Only the one can make that determination. You made me think!

Kerry O'Connor said...

Each part creates a picture of the whole.

hedgewitch said...

The power of this one, as in so many of your poems, MZ, is not in what you say, but in what is left unsaid, and the picture couldn't be sharper.

georgeplaceblog said...

standing ovation... wow

welshstream said...

So much said, so much time covered in so few words. Wonderful

Helen said...

Love how you get to the heart of the matter ~~~

C.C. said...

Love the full circle rhythm of this.

Susie Clevenger said...

You give us words that hold a lifetime in what is not said. That is the power of your writing.

Margaret said...

So fresh, so young. Life's twists and turns aren't always happily ever after. So emotional layered with really very little said - but Oh, did my mind race and fill in the "blanks". Perfect poetry.

blueoran said...

Pictures of a portrait of a marriage--very smart stuff. The sing-song saw of something borrowed and blue becomes a blue bell tolling in a dry chapel. A plains song, perhaps, pressed into the sad landscape. This is something like the old lace found at the bottom of a hope chest.

Gillena Cox said...

luv the circular form of old and new

much love...

grapeling said...

as always, eloquent ~

my heart's love songs said...

i agree that this reads like a song, but there's always a rhythm to your words. a brilliant poem, MZ!