Saturday, December 20, 2014

Silver Tells

I look like bad road, country bad road;
at least forty miles.
Oh, how the season
has aged me.
I grab make-up
and some lip plump -
go camouflage style.
But I can't do a thing with my hair.

Silver tells.
The silver tells.
I'm getting grey hair
for Christmas.
Not a sprinkling.
The whole damn thing.
Soon I'll be old lady grey.

I've got wrinkles
and I tinkle
when I laugh hard or sneeze.
My knees pop and crack their own rhythm.
I've got Depends,
Spanx with sequins,
and handfuls of Aleve.
But I can't do a thing with my hair.

Silver tells.
The silver tells.
I'm getting grey hair
for Christmas.
Not a sprinkling.
The whole damn thing.
Soon I'll be old lady grey.

A bit of parody for Kerry's prompt at Real Toads.  Hope this qualifies, Kerry!

15 comments:

Helen said...

This is just too wonderful! Wishing you silver bells and a Merry Christmas!

georgeplaceblog said...

Now, every time I hear that song I'll think of Silver Tells... and laugh. I think it works fine :)

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Judging by the photos I have seen of you, I know this is a parody. I love "I'm getting grey hair for Christmas". This made me smile. Love your humor.

Yvonne Osborne said...

Love! As someone who has never been able to do a damn thing with her hair.
Merry Christmas!

Sioux said...

I cannot style my hair at all, but I can dye it. (Who knows when something disastrous will happen with an amateur applying cheap hair dye?)

Björn Rudberg said...

Yes but as a man I have to say that gray hair is better than nothing... Just put some color in mine ;-)

Mimi Foxmorton said...

Haha.
I love you!
;)

manicddaily said...

Ha. Oh dear. I am lucky (I guess) that I have the kind of hair that doesn't grey much (just gets mousy.) I won't comment on the rest! Very clever and have a blessed and restful Christmas. K .

Kerry O'Connor said...

This is perfect!

hedgewitch said...

It's all a freaking comedy anyway, so you NEED a clown wig, I say. Mine is a bit crooked at times, but hey--I'm still sucking air. Love the spangles and the sustaining presence of Aleve. Happy Horrordays, MZ.

Fireblossom said...

*goes into deep mourning at this news*

C.C. said...

Haha...this is, unfortunately, a little close to home for the holidays! But, written so lyrically it's still like music to my ears. Beautifully done.

R.K. Garon said...

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
ZQ

Marian said...

oof! watch out for those jingle jowls...

grapeling said...

brilliant ! ~