Monday, January 20, 2014

Under Saner Stars

Under saner stars,
my last breath
would bring blooms from this broken body.
I'd be covered in a casket of daisies,
and there'd be no need to choose a song.

My headboard would be my headstone;
blank, but for the date.
There'd be viewings and visitations,
but I wouldn't participate.

The service would be silent
unless someone felt a need to pray
with hands raised to the heavens;
Pentecostal . . . but not all day.

Under saner stars,
my last breath
would be years from an unbroken body.
I'd have time to gather the daisies.
I'd have time to write the song.

For Open Link Monday at Real Toads

19 comments:

Lorraine Renaud said...

A Daisy Day will be the best ofyour life...very poignant

Susan said...

Yes. How beautiful!

Fireblossom said...

I'm wondering of this poem kind of wrote itself after you had the title and the idea of the song and daisies. Regardless, it is poignant and skillfully written.

hedgewitch said...

Headboard so often becomes headstone, or all we can know of our own, anyway...and the song--we never want to believe we've heard the last verse--surely there's time for one more rewrite. Bleak, yet haunting piece, MZ.

Kathryn said...

Hoping we all have time to collect the daisies and write our own song. Love the headboard as a headstone.

Sioux said...

So moving. (And the "Pentecostal...but not all day" line is perfect.)

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I certainly hope you have fifty more years to write that song, kiddo!

grapeling said...

I like the subtle rhymes, and how they play contra the tone ~

scotthastiepoet said...

A very strong and poignant write Mama Zen - keep on keeping on... With Best Wishes Scott www.scotthastie.com

blueoran said...

Reads like latter-day Emily Dickenson, the same sort of verbal delighting croosed by existential puzzling. Under saner stars, perhaps. "Pentacostal ... but not all day" is heaven.

Susie Clevenger said...

"a headboard for a headstone" love that...may we all have many more daisy gathering days

Robert Bourne said...

loved the line "Pentacostal... but not all day"... hopefully we all can collect the daisies for a while longer...

Pealogic said...

I love the poem and the lack of fuss expressed.

Gemma Wiseman said...

Keeping the verses of our song alive for as long as possible is like some non verbalised quest we all have. Love the connection with daisies, collecting them as words for the song rather than waiting for them to find their own life when we may be long gone.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Fabulous - start to finish!

steph said...

Wow, wonderful.. under saner stars.. I love it, all of it.

my heart's love songs said...

an amazing poem, MZ!

"Under Saner Stars" has to be one of the BEST lines EVER!

Sam Edge Author said...

Thant just damn good poetry MZ!

Sam Edge Author said...
This comment has been removed by the author.