Saturday, November 2, 2013

In Reply

A letter couldn't have pleased
me more!  You must be doing well.
No strains upon your health,
nerves, or peace of mind to report.
No tales about the boss from hell,
that bitch, Miranda,
(she ever find a {sucker} roommate?),

or the frat boys down the hall.
And best of all (yes, I'm selfish),
your love for me remains
strong and unchanged (despite how long
it's been since we could even kiss).
No letter could please
more than this.  Is that why you don't write?

This is pretty rough, and I'm not sure if my point is getting across.  Let me know!
Written for Kerry's prompt at Real Toads.

19 comments:

Robert Bourne said...

I thought you got the point across very well... the ending caught my attention... well done...

Kay L. Davies said...

"A letter couldn't have pleased me more..."
...than? Very good, leaving that to our imaginations, along with time factors. Obviously this beloved person never used the writer except for someone upon whom to unload his/her complaints.
Yes, I think you got the point across.
K

Fireblossom said...

No news is good news, or at least, the speaker's wished-for world isn't undone by contrary information?

Sounds like she's been moved to the back burner or forgotten, but she doesn't want to face that. Who would?

Brian Miller said...

stinks when they move off and forget all about you...and def makes one question the reality of it...or their motives in not writing...

Hannah said...

I enjoy the conversational one-sided multi-faceted story within this poem, MZ...excellent!

albert said...

beautiful poem i consider a fantastic write kisses

manicddaily said...

Ha! A lot of clever fun, with a few sharp pokes. Thanks MZ> k.

Susan said...

Oh, that missing letter can render one at least momentarily bitter and hurt. Sounds like she hasn't tried writing first--unless this is her letter. An ironic epistle, with seemingly random timing.

Kerry O'Connor said...

There is nothing worse than a fair weather friend, unless its one of those foul weather kind, who only needs you when he/she has something to moan about.

You set up the ideal situation all too well, MZ, and left us with an ache around the heart. How awful to be forgotten by someone starting a new life.

grapeling said...

sharply twisted, MZ

Lorraine said...

i don't know about the prompt thing, but I know i sure love this...

blueoran said...

We carry on these conversations with the absent all the time -- a letter would be nice -- if the news were -- what could be worse -- a letter with the wrong news?

cucumber sunrise said...

You're in love with the person who should be writing you letters but isn't.

I'm addicted to the show Hart of Dixie on Netflix at present. There are two people who are very much in love but one will not allow the relationship to be, although the other is more than willing. They hardly speak, but are forced to see each only other from a distance, and in memory. That's what this makes me think of. Lovers separated, one somewhat wishing the other were miserable and writing to beg or express deepest sorrow and longing. But the letter never comes. The writer of this poem is giving a "reply" to thin air. Although, she does still know how deeply and intensely she is loved, even though there are no shared words. Only thoughts.

hedgewitch said...

The undefined, the unsaid, can be read the way we want it, and thus feed us so much more than the possibly grim reality--this is one of those trick funhouse mirror sort of concepts you write about so well, and it carries a lot of truth--reality is always the toad in the fantasy garden.

Sam Edge said...

Thanks for nothing ... sceneries here wish you were beautiful.

Marian said...

oh, darn.

Loredana Donovan said...

Oh yes the betrayal of so-called friends you never hear from again ... you did get your point across well.

Susie Clevenger said...

Hate to be forgotten!! You certainly got your point across. :)

Margaret said...

Ingenious and so SMARTLY done. I'm always left in awe of you…