Friday, October 4, 2013

Johnny Walker

Johnny walk her home
in the high, dry heat of summer.
Johnny walk her home
in the teasing wet of spring.
Johnny walk her home
when leaves rustle like a rumor.
Sure as winter snow,
he's the company she keeps.

For Corey's prompt at Real Toads

21 comments:

Carol Steel said...

This is a fun piece, yet dark at the same time. I do like the "rustle like a rumor" and "teasing wet of spring." Full images in so many ways.

Herotomost said...

Yeah....that's a lot of thought in a small package. I would think that would be a great poem to start a novel with, I could almost start writing a large prose piece just based on this piece. It speaks volumes....great work MZ!!!

Kerry O'Connor said...

Johnny walk her home
when leaves rustle like a rumor.

Love the way these lines sound.

Robert Bourne said...

a few words that pack a punch...lots weaved into this... well done

Fireblossom said...

You always say things in a novel way, and musically too.

Susan said...

Love this blend of nursery rhyme and death walk--reminds me a bit of Gwendolyn Brooks, "we real cool" ...

L. Edgar Otto said...

Did she walk with Johnny or did Johnny Walker walk her?

Did they settle for that near coming again to the random walk to the night lamp post?

On Father's Day I went down the isle of the ladies I knew and who know me as no threat... and said "happy father's day - I would like to celebrate by becoming a new father." each in turn laughed but one who forgot a card to her dad.
Then I went back the other way and said "Sorry Miss, I realized we would have to name he twins Little Yegger and Little Meister." and they all laughed again as the bar tender seemed quite confused.

georgeplace2013 said...

This is so clever. I just love this. It could be a sung as a ballad. VERY nice.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Great write, MZ. Dark and deep.

Lorraine said...

I don't drink, but even if i don't I love this how you wrote that in mmmmm, beautiful

Rachelle Smith Stokes said...

Nice literal walk through the seasons, and turning "Johnny Walker" into "Johnny walk her" was very clever!

manicddaily said...

This is so sharp and clever; really rather heartbreaking despite the incisiveness--wonderful rhythms and quick brush strokes to paint the seasons. Super well done, MZ. k.

manicddaily said...

Brush strokes not just of seasons--you really animate the surroundings. Wonderful--k.

Grandmother (Mary) said...

The reference to the name of whiskey as his name gives it a slightly ominous feel. A whole tale here...

hedgewitch said...

Had a lot of friends whose best friend Johnny, or Jack, walked them home...some in a box--this has a lilt and swing to it that carries the subject with grace, and never falters in focus.

Sam Edge said...

you pack so much uch is so few words. Nice work.

Brian Miller said...

nice word play with johnny walk her...like the rustle of rumor as well....lotta story in a few lines mz

Kay L. Davies said...

I was trying to put my finger on what there was about this that caught my attention and brought back memories. I think our friend Hedgewitch hit on it..."a lilt and swing" and I would add that it has an almost martial air.
I like it very, very much, MZ.
K

Lolamouse said...

This would make a grown up jumprope song!

Marian said...

gosh i didn't really get dark from this, just lyric and pleasing.

aspiritofsimplicity said...

love this one! Very creative. I suppose one could do worse for company