Monday, June 17, 2013

A Kindness

My time in the womb
was a waste of us both -
forming me feminine
and disappointing all of your hopes
for a son.
I've come to see there's a kindness done
when the spider just scuttles away.

Inspired by Kay's  Mini-Challenge and submitted to Open Link Monday at Real Toads.

20 comments:

Susan said...

What a fragile brittle poem, with neglect raised just slightly aver abuse! And then, its strength on the page belies its narrator's assertion that womb-time was a "waste of us both." The spider analogy works resonates.

Helen said...

This is the equivalent of a poetic slap in the face, a punch in the gut and it is awesome!!!

Sioux said...

The last two lines were fu$#ing brilliant...the perfect end to a powerful piece.

(But what else do we expect, except brilliance every day...)

Timoteo said...

I could see "Happy Dad's Day" at the end.

Kerry O'Connor said...

A mother's rejection of her child is a crime against nature - even spiders will carry their young on their backs.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

You and your powerful sketches. Your poems remind me of great editorial cartoons of the soul - trenchant and true and immediately recognizable as perfect.

Yes, the ending reminds me of what I heard the Dalai Lama say: If you can't help others, then please, at least, don't hurt them.

Love and respect sent your way,
el Mosk

hedgewitch said...

I'm down to a single word for this one--perfect.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Powerful, MZ. Not a chance of anything being wasted to produce a creature as brilliant as you! I love the "scuttling" spider.

Fireblossom said...

Some are formed feminine. Others *achieve* greatness!

Susie Clevenger said...

How sad, the rejection of a child by his/her mother. I agree this poem gave a verbal b----- Slap!

Brian Miller said...

ugh. unwanted....the spider metaphor in the end...says much...

Kay L. Davies said...

Wow. I expected dynamite from you when I posted the spider prompt, and got dynamite squared.
K

Grandmother said...

Imagine having these preconceived notions and missing the gift in front of you...

Lorraine said...

wrong so wrong but you write it right and spider...gosh

Akila G said...

oh! you have worded so well here!

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Margaret said...

Well, other than "Canine hemorrhoids" above this is a perfect post. I don't usually "gasp" at the ends of poems, but I did here.

grapeling said...

your poem has bitten me and now I'll wander all day scratching. ~ M

W.k. kortas said...

Short, sharp, and biting--and a little shy on overriding emotion, which I suspect was the point.