Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Keeper

Giving birth rips you wide
from womb
to wound long scarred
but still tender inside.

Barely is the babe in arms
before mother's milk
curdles
from fear of coming harms.

But, is it the future
scried,
or past terrors
that cloud the present eye?

Time and distance
lost
with her first howling breath,
and old hurts fresh,

but cutting deeper.
The poorly kept
is
a nervous keeper.

For Open Link Night at dVerse

39 comments:

Brian Miller said...

great phrasing and pacing through this...we are resonating a bit in our feelings today as well...the fear that comes with bearing children...i think a bit of our own fears that creap in...and maybe a few hopes that they dont do some of the things i did ...smiles...

chromapoesy.com said...

This poem displays so much emotional intelligence, thank you.

mrs mediocrity said...

oh my, yes... what a fabulous ending...
so hard, it starts at birth, 26 years later still feeling these same things...

poemblaze said...

From the pain of birth to the fear of being a bad parent when one has had a poor upbringing. Well done. So much overwhelming emotion in those first moments as a parent.

darkangelwrites said...

My six year old stepped in front of a moving car the other day and I died a thousand times in that millisecond. I screamed so sharply and loudly that a few birds actually did die of fright come to think of it.

Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger said...

My children are 22 and 25 and I still feel the same way. Amazingly, they continue to live their lives anyway--Lovely piece--

ayala said...

The fear never goes away..lovely capture.

Daydreamertoo said...

Someone told me, it doesn't ever matter to a mother how old her children are. Even in their 50's to a mother, they are still her children.
Lovely.

chris said...

Very strong write. The fear that parents live with starts at the moment of conception and never really goes away. All the more true if one has had a difficult childhood.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

This has a universal undercurrent of love for children, and an ever greater undercurrent of fear of the unknown. Great poem,lady.

Shawna said...

"from womb to wound" Amen.

I like your one- and two-word lines.

Fireblossom said...

"The poorly kept is a nervous keeper." Damn, that's nicely turned, and so true.

Myrna R. said...

This really expresses that needed balance between fear of the future and caring for one's child. I love this. Don't know if you intend it, or if I just feel it, but I felt that tension in caring for our children - a never ending prospect.

Nice to write about parenting. What an important topic.

kaykuala said...

Childbirth has been likened to a struggle or even a fight to stay alive. Man is the one more afraid as he is responsible but not suffering enough for it. Great write MZ!

Hank

Ginny Brannan said...

Afraid of the present, or ghosts of terrors past? Intense reading, this piece. Well penned.

hedgewitch said...

This has a stair step sort of beat, not really fully a song type of poem, but still with something of that sort of rhythmic framework--it's just too biting for singing, and the look back is as hard as the look ahead. Fine poem, MZ.

Sylvia K said...

Terrific, MZ, after having four who are now in their 40s, I feel the same way.

wood said...

very well done! the tone of fear and trepidation is quite biting in this poem.

"but cutting deeper.
The poorly kept
is
a nervous keeper."

very intersting way to end... makes me worry even more... again, very well done

Susie Clevenger said...

From first cry we fear what might come to our child. You have stated it so well. No matter the age a child is our child...we always wish to protect them.

Charles Elliott/Beautyseer said...

Ypu and Brian seem to be on the same wavelength today.

Those fears only get worse when they grow up and report back from the road with their death metal band that they are drunk, brawling and laughing online about subjects that should strike fear in them instead. But they have to grow up and learn by making mistakes.

You just hope they DO grow up. And that they make better choices. SIGH!

Patricia said...

such a beautiful write ...
straight from a mother's heart
and written with such an amazingly skilled pen. =)

S.E.Ingraham said...

"the poorly kept is a nervous keeper" - what a brilliant line ... speaking strictly as a mother, that will haunt me for days ... good poem

http://leapinelephants.blogspot.ca/2012/05/no-more-than-bird-with-piercing-voice.html#comment-form

Claudia said...

straight from a mother's heart...and think each parent can relate to this..

manicddaily said...

Yes, you bring up the chopped up fear of it all. Well done. k.

manicddaily said...

Yes, you bring up the chopped up fear of it all. Well done. k.

Brendan said...

What surer (or bloodier) anchor to this world than to have a part of one's self out there in it, beyond the womb that couldn't keep that other safe forever? Great enquiry into the real cost of motherhood. - Brendan

Dave King said...

I can relate to this. It brings to mind watching the (difficult) birth of our son and then (more straightforwardly) that of our daughter. Beautifully written. Much thanks.

John (@bookdreamer) said...

Captures well those moments of fearful terror. I'm so looking forward to the day I can look into the eyes of my son as he becomes a father and show him I know!

hyperCRYPTICal said...

I do so understand - my children are still my children, precious little things - however old they might be now...

Anna :o]

Kerry O'Connor said...

I never had a fear in the world until my first child was born, then I realized what a hostile environment we live in.

Olivia said...

Intense!!
heartfelt xoxo

beckykilsby said...

Great play and control all through this one.. really enjoyed the read and how you have managed the subject. And yes, can totally identify with this..

Fred Rutherford said...

Strong write MZ. Really love the But, is the future stanza, made me stop a second and reflect- Excellent job. Thanks

Andrew Kreider said...

The poorly kept is a nervous keeper. What a fantastic final line. You catch the frailty and the fearing so well. Great stuff!

Carol Steel 5050 said...

This is a great poem. You have control over every word ...and touch those of us who fear for our children abd hope to give better than we got. Really appreciate this one.

Glenn Buttkus said...

You are the poetic earth mother, and
your poem is so very touching, tinged
with the frustration of parenthood,
yet including the insights and realizations
most of us had to come to just before
the nest emptied, and control moved
into with three friends. Thanks.

Margaret said...

So tightly written and yet it is a poem to sit and ponder. Love, love the third paragraph!

Laura said...

"before mother's milk
curdles
from fear of coming harms." and the fear continues, it is hard to make peace with it as they get older, prepare to go out into the world on their own, and I've been told, long after they have made a home of their own, a mother's milk still curdles, longing to protect grown children from invisible lurking dangers.

Mystic_Mom said...

Very nicely done, evokes a lot of memories and emotions.