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| Prophetess by Alphose Muche |
I threw for you the most splendid sunrise,
but didn't wake you when the morning came.
I arranged for you a dance of fireflies,
then lied, kept you inside, said there was rain.
And so, my gifts, my gifts, are left to lie.
I spread out a blanket on the hillside,
then didn't tell you how to meet me there.
Now, I sit alone here by the fireside
pretending I don't have an empty chair.
My gifts, all my gifts, are left to lie.
For Fireblossom Friday
32 comments:
Heartbreaking and beautiful.
Makes me sad...but sometimes life is like that.
I really like the opening line. Sounds like it would have been a lovely party if you hadn't been so possessive of your gifts.
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GOODNESS, I love this. It lilts, and breaks the heart. Such a sorrowful song, and that double meaning in "lie," just wonderful.
Wonderful write. Such sadness to this one.
I'm torn, Kelli, as I read and re-read this one. On the one hand, your craft just keeps getting better. Something like this, it's just really, really good. But it's so heartbreakingly sad that the speaker, who has the ability and the magic to throw a sunrise or create a firefly dance, is still alone, and alone through her own action or omission. There's something of wilted roses in this, something so beautiful that's been allowed to pass by.
Thanks for gracing my challenge with such an exceptional poem.
Can't say it any better than Moskowitz. A fine poem, MZ.
So sad, heartbreaking...yet so beautiful.
Yes .. this is tragically sad, left me wondering why, oh why.
Beautiful poem.
that it is...i really like what shay said though ...someone that has that much magic and still ends up alone...still feels the need to live by the lie...hard
This is so sad, Kelli. And it rings very true and terribly familiar. I read the fates of so many women in it, prisoners of their own self-made prisons. Really good.
Wowzers, this one gives the heart a painful squeeze. Absolutely beautifully written, and haunting.
Ah, regrets!
Yes, I agree with what everyone else said.
And as a prophetess, she would have known all this before, but did nothing to amend it. I read it as a test of love: if his love was strong and true, he would not need to have been woken to it, nor would he need directions where to find her. Sometimes, it seems women end up doing all the work in a relationship, and still end up with the empty chair.
Having said all this in interpretation, I am nonetheless left with the question: Where did MZ find these beautiful ideas, and the words to match, the perfect rhymes? In which ethereal zone does her muse reside, because mine needs a kick in the butt to send her there.
This is my favourite of the challenge.
Poignancy & regret, beautifully conveyed.
Awww.... we always pay the price for our wrongs... seems she has.
Beautifully sad.
lonely ode to self.
This is so good. The heartbreak in this left me with quite different impressions than those before me but the power of your words leaves me breathless!
I see her, the prophetess, having done these things before and being told, "Let me sleep" or "I'm busy" and she learned, the hard way, that the most magical of gifts can be ignored, even by those you love, and sometimes that empty chair is as good a company as the one you long to fill it.
You are 100% WOW on this one!
I had to come back for another read. It is just so good.
Heartbreak and your last lines on both stanzas are superb ~
Great writing MZ~
Fantastic, Kelli. "my gifts are all left to lie" but the speaker takes responsibility for the failure. Wonderful.
K
Somber write. Very well written. Thanks MZ.
This gave me goosebumps! Seriously well done!
Prick to the heart!! Nicely done, MZ!!!
BTW -- I just saw your sunflower -- looks like seeded beads (bead work) ... beautiful!! :)
i would interprete this as someone who tries to re-vive a relationship and always has the best things in mind but then...when it's time to really do it...she realizes, she just can't... and heck...yes it is sad..and it is real life..i like it much
So heartbreaking! Too bad she can't realize the magic to heal her heart already lies within herself.
very nice. the danger of things unsaid.
Lyrical and sadly authentic.
Such magic left unappreciated. It is heartbreaking.
Beautiful !
A ballad for the love that couldn't because we forget to write the poem -- or rather, wrote the poem about forgetting to pass the script around. Terrific. - Brendan
stunning! stunning! stunning!
i'm grateful you didn't hide the gift of your words!
♥
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