I said
sing to me
obscenities
in every shade of blue.
Swear the sky cerulean,
and the ocean aqua, too.
And, you did.
I said
judge me
with your jealousy
in every shade of green.
Damn me with your emerald eyes
and all they haven't seen.
And, you did.
I said
humble me
with half truths
in every shade of gray.
Tourniquet the truth
until all feeling dies away.
And, you did.
For Imaginary Garden with Real Toads
28 comments:
Even if I didn't speak English, that opening stanza would still sound gorgeous, spoken aloud. "Swear the sky cerulean, and the ocean aqua too". Mercy, that flows.
Yessss - I agree with Fireblossom - it flows, it does ...
very beautiful, i like the rhythm and rhyme, very like the tom waits song. very, very nice. i wanna hear you sing it!
Oh, yes! You've done it again! Superb as always, MZ! And no one does it better. And it does flow!
Sylvia
i LOVE this, especially... "Tourniquet the truth
until all feeling dies away"
Great flow...i hung on each word
well done
The classic "be careful what you ask for"story, sadly. Very well done.
"Tourniquet the truth..." What a gorgeous phrase.
Wow. Mercy, indeed.
Wow. This was great. "judge me with your jealousy in every shade of green" And I probably have. "until all feeling dies away" This touched my heart a little.
Love it all: the use of colour, the skillful control of rhythm and the progression of ideas. Remarkable.
You do so delight my days - whatever you do or not.
Most of these Tom Waits-inspired posts dance with Amor, the downward-burning torch of Eros, wings on fire, spiraling down down down into that deadly pit of wrong love -- what Hedgewitch correctly identified as "Addicted to Love," or that Brian Ferry tune "Slave to Love." Like all addictions, we love the deadly fool's gold as substitute enough for real love (because we ourselves cannot live so honestly). I'm really proud of the work you're doing these days. You've mastered the form. - Brendan
Love all the colours and passion flowing from your words ~
This rocks MZ ~
I'm with Fireblossom. Oh, that line. I will keep it in my head all day. :)
tourniquet the truth....that line is def my fav....fine write mz
This has both balance and a singular lance-like focus, stabbing at the way things work--excellent use of color and language throughout, MZ.Yes, call for it and it will come.
Powerful. And it ends with a real punch! Bravo.
Awesome write, terrific words like "cerulean, and tourniquet" ouch.
and you did...
write with all the colors of the rainbow!
Oh, Mama!
You did yourself proud. Took three colors and opened up their true selves to the reader. Made us feel the essence of blue, green, gray.
Mz, love the flow here. Great word choices, some really cool words here. And love how it all fits together. Thanks
"until all feeling dies away"
And, it did.
Fabulous.
Love this. Thank you.
Brilliant, I really love this. :-)
Yet another amazing verse.
An excellent poem, so perfectly expressed...
Lovely language, rhythm, the beautiful underlying the sharp. K.
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