Thursday, November 10, 2011

Dahlias

Sawdust dahlias in a paper bag.
Tied with a ribbon from your hair.
Held tight against your chest and carried.
I wonder where we're going.

This old bridge has seen its better days.
The river peeks between the rails.
At the mercy of a strong south wind,
a girl could fall

and mistake herself for flying.

55 words for my G-Man!

22 comments:

G-Man said...

DON'T DO IT!!!!
Look what happenned to Billy Jo McAllister.
Loved your 55 MZ
Always well thought out, always Perfect!
Thanks for playing, and have a Kick Ass Week-End

ayala said...

Love it !

Brian Miller said...

could..really well penned...just watch the landing...

The Cello Strings said...

hopefully, she will land safely.

awesome 55,
Happy Friday.

Sylvia K said...

Land safely indeed! Terrific as always!

Sylvia

Matt D said...

The last line makes this poem epic.

Excellent and I love it.

Thank you!

Mijayami said...

Love the ending. Great 55.

KB said...

Wonderful, as always.

Fireblossom said...

G Man...pass the biscuits please.

MZ, I can feel that wind.

Fireblossom said...

PS--Curious why you chose dahlias, and not familiar with "sawdust dahlias" at all (the tubers they put out have to be dug up in fall, I discovered, and stored in sawdust or something dry), I found that one of the meanings of this flower is "forever thine." So I'm thinking my first impression was right, that this is a literal or figurative death or funeral journey. It's melancholy in an uneasy gothic way, and of course, love both strengthens and weakens and people pass out at funerals all the time. Whether that was quite what you had in mind, I'm not sure, but I like reading it that way.

anthonynorth said...

Excellent - especially the last line.

somewhereamelody said...

Perfect!
The first stanza ends brilliantly with " I wonder where we're going"

THe metaphor in the second stanza is strong, I love the image of the river peaking between the rails...

The twist on the last line is genius.

Claudia said...

ha..easy to mistake falling for flying..ugh..

Dave King said...

Fabulous last line!

willofheart said...

I really love the last lines... great post

mylittlewordz said...

I really like that, particulary that last phrase. Very good!

Jamie

Monkey Man said...

There is a haunting innocence to this that I really like.

hedgewitch said...

Read this several times and still can't make up my mind--there's something personal going on with those dahlias, though. Beautiful and enigmatic 55.

Teresa said...

This is a great poem. It has great imagery.

Teresa said...

This is a great poem. It has great imagery.

Fred said...

Very cool write MZ, Awesome choice of flower by the way-very symbolic, can mean dignity, elegance, Forever yours and also instability. Love how it fits into the piece. Thanks

Caty said...

In the first stanza I pictured a young girl lying in a casket...the 2nd stanza her destination.

"This old bridge has seen its better days.
The river peeks between the rails."

These were my favorite lines...It made me think of the old bridge and soothing creek in my back yard. Love the imagery in this write :)